Updated: Nov 15
By McKenna Leavens
I often write about relationships and how to be there for your significant other, but I have never addressed the most important love of all… friendship.
Some of our first memories as kids involve building friendships, whether it was your next-door neighbor or the little boy you sat next to in the third grade. In fact, some of us are still best friends with our very FIRST friends. Knowing how to be a good friend is SO important, and I don’t think it’s talked about enough.
I’ve met many different kinds of people in my short little life. I’ve met people who I’ve connected with immediately and others who never left a mark.
The most memorable ones are those whose energy is bright and their soul is spilling out with love. Those who weren’t so memorable are usually the ones who can’t even get a smile out toward you… we all know those kinds of people.
What I look for in a friend is someone to listen, build me up, and show up for me when I need them. We all make mistakes in friendships and we all hurt one another’s feelings. But the most important thing is being able to talk to your friend about what hurt your feelings or what they did wrong so that they can fix it. It’s very similar to relationships… there’s just no making out… I mean unless you’re into that.
MY POINT IS, being a friend is having the ability to feel their pain, and make them feel loved, wanted, and heard.
My best friend whom I have been close with since I was 13, basically seven years and counting, puts up with me and all of my craziness. Lord knows she has patience.
One day we got into an argument, well it was more me arguing and her taking it… but I was really upset because I felt as if she wasn’t being there for me at all. So we had a conversation and in the end, she apologized but that wasn’t the most important part.
The moment I realized she was a great friend was when we never had to have that conversation again. That girl has shown up for me in ways that no one ever has. She calls me, checks in on me, and continuously makes me laugh even when it seems impossible to. She truly listened to me and understood that her not being there for when I needed her the most was hurting me. Instead of sending me a long text about how sorry she was, she showed it through her actions.
Now trust me, I am no saint of a friend. I do the best I can, but of course, I can be hard to deal with on my bad days, we all can. Being a friend isn’t about being perfect, it’s about realizing when you’re being a shitty friend and making up for it. It’s about making your best friend feel pretty, even if you’re not feeling that pretty. DON’T be the jealous friend girls… nothing is uglier than being the jealous friend I promise you.
Build each other up, love each other unconditionally, and quit being judgy! You may have not gotten through some of your hardest days if it wasn’t for your best friend to support you and lift you back up. Here’s to all the girls who smile back, and here’s to all the best friends who show up for each other.